The phone rang. Odd, as it was fairly early in the morning. It wasn't odd that I was awake though. Having a three week old baby at home will do that to you.
He was our last child. A nearly ten year gap between our last two kids, Gage was a "promise fulfilled". Three weeks earlier, he almost didn't make it. One week overdue to deliver, I was admitted to the hospital to be induced. Taking a little longer than anticipated, assistance was given to break my water. And with that, so did everything else inside. Only problem was, the cord was wrapped around Gage's neck. Any pushing on my part would have strangled him.
Rushing me quickly to the emergency room, a Caesarean section was performed and Gage made it into this 'wonderful' world.
This 'wonderful' world that a short three weeks later would be forever changed on 9/11.
When I picked up the phone it was my husband calling me from work. He had taken the first two weeks off after Gage's birth to help me out. Now feeling well enough on my own, and us now provider for three kids, he was back at work for week three. He had called to check on me before so the fact he called wasn't surprising. The time of day however, was.
Turning the television on at his request, I was numb.
Nothing could explain what I was watching. Nothing could explain that second plane.
You could say it was post-partum depression or "baby blues" but my non-stop tears were mixed with an overwhelming sense of awe. Awe at what was happening right before my very eyes. Lives lost, changed, not only here in America but around the world. This wasn't some movie or television show. This was a reality show/horror movie that we could not change the channel or press the STOP button. This was real.
Tears of another kind flowed that morning. The crying of a baby waking up, wet and hungry. Gage was awake. My precious bundle brought me quickly to another reality. Motherhood.
The entire day is somewhat of a blur now. I remember where I was when my husband called. I remember what I was wearing. I even remember calling my friend at work to see if she had heard about what happened. (She had not.) But when your baby calls you, focus and priorities change.
Even typing that brings me pause.....when your baby calls you.
How many mothers and fathers lost their children on 9/11? Did they call out for their moms and dads in those last few moments of their lives?
And how many children lost their parents on 9/11? Did they call out for their mom or dad when told of their deaths? Do they still?
I held Gage a little closer that day. This precious baby brought into what had been a 'wonderful' world only three weeks earlier now living in an uncertain future. Or so I thought.
Gage turned 10 just a few weeks back. The 10th anniversary of 9/11 is tomorrow. Rememberances and tributes flood news websites and telelvision shows. It has all brought the memories back to me of that day I just recalled above. This weekend, I will hold him a little closer just like 10 years ago. If he'l let me.
My experience that day IN NO WAY compares to what those directly affected have gone through these last 10 years or will this weekend. As I did that day for them and whenever they've crossed my mind in these last 10 years, I will do again this weekend: Pray.
Until next time,
RSPS Sunny
p.s. I felt compelled to write this post today. The words were flowing so I know that God wanted me to write this. As I stated in my previous post, I will only write when God tells me to. So, it may be awhile before I write again. Then again, it could be tomorrow. Only God knows.
He was our last child. A nearly ten year gap between our last two kids, Gage was a "promise fulfilled". Three weeks earlier, he almost didn't make it. One week overdue to deliver, I was admitted to the hospital to be induced. Taking a little longer than anticipated, assistance was given to break my water. And with that, so did everything else inside. Only problem was, the cord was wrapped around Gage's neck. Any pushing on my part would have strangled him.
Rushing me quickly to the emergency room, a Caesarean section was performed and Gage made it into this 'wonderful' world.
This 'wonderful' world that a short three weeks later would be forever changed on 9/11.
When I picked up the phone it was my husband calling me from work. He had taken the first two weeks off after Gage's birth to help me out. Now feeling well enough on my own, and us now provider for three kids, he was back at work for week three. He had called to check on me before so the fact he called wasn't surprising. The time of day however, was.
Turning the television on at his request, I was numb.
Nothing could explain what I was watching. Nothing could explain that second plane.
You could say it was post-partum depression or "baby blues" but my non-stop tears were mixed with an overwhelming sense of awe. Awe at what was happening right before my very eyes. Lives lost, changed, not only here in America but around the world. This wasn't some movie or television show. This was a reality show/horror movie that we could not change the channel or press the STOP button. This was real.
Tears of another kind flowed that morning. The crying of a baby waking up, wet and hungry. Gage was awake. My precious bundle brought me quickly to another reality. Motherhood.
The entire day is somewhat of a blur now. I remember where I was when my husband called. I remember what I was wearing. I even remember calling my friend at work to see if she had heard about what happened. (She had not.) But when your baby calls you, focus and priorities change.
Even typing that brings me pause.....when your baby calls you.
How many mothers and fathers lost their children on 9/11? Did they call out for their moms and dads in those last few moments of their lives?
And how many children lost their parents on 9/11? Did they call out for their mom or dad when told of their deaths? Do they still?
I held Gage a little closer that day. This precious baby brought into what had been a 'wonderful' world only three weeks earlier now living in an uncertain future. Or so I thought.
Gage turned 10 just a few weeks back. The 10th anniversary of 9/11 is tomorrow. Rememberances and tributes flood news websites and telelvision shows. It has all brought the memories back to me of that day I just recalled above. This weekend, I will hold him a little closer just like 10 years ago. If he'l let me.
My experience that day IN NO WAY compares to what those directly affected have gone through these last 10 years or will this weekend. As I did that day for them and whenever they've crossed my mind in these last 10 years, I will do again this weekend: Pray.
Until next time,
RSPS Sunny
p.s. I felt compelled to write this post today. The words were flowing so I know that God wanted me to write this. As I stated in my previous post, I will only write when God tells me to. So, it may be awhile before I write again. Then again, it could be tomorrow. Only God knows.
0 comments:
Post a Comment